Sunday, May 10, 2009

I'm freaking out!

The documentary airs here in less than an hour. I'm feeling nervous, and I don't know why. I've seen it already. It has been available for viewing on-line for a couple of days now at HBO. I know it is out there.

When I started this blog, it was a place for me to write down stories about Mom in one place, and to have the art photos in one place. But then people actually started reading. I made some really good friends, and found a lot of support from fellow caregivers. Little did I know it would lead to this.

Welcome to new readers. Feel free to pull up a chair and poke around a bit. Unfortunately, I'm not real good about labeling the Mom stories, you'll have to find them on your own. However, click on the Art label over there in the side bar, and you'll see more of Mom's Art of Alzheimer's photos, usually with the story behind it.

13 comments:

~Betsy said...

I just finished watching the HBO documentary. I had no idea you and your sweet mom were a part of it, but while watching I turned to my husband and said, "I know this girl. I know her blog!" And sure enough, I do.
Your story was wonderful. You are an amazing daughter and an amazing caretaker. God bless.

cornbread hell said...

"click on the art label."

that's exactly what i told the 1000s of people i've told about the hbo series and about your blog.


...ok, maybe only about 10. who told 10... who told 10...

(psst, annie, just think about how lucky the people are who found you. people like me.)

a striver for sanity said...

That was an amazing documentary even though I cried through most of it. You are an amazing care giver. It goes to show what a wonderful upbringing your mother gave you for you to be taking such wonderful care of her now that the tables are turned. You are both two beautiful people. God bless.

rilera said...

Annie, I cried through your story, especially the part with the stone, remembering the quarter incident. Thank you for sharing your story both in this blog and in the documentary.

All of the stories were so very moving, especially Cliff's and Woody's. I hate this disease, but I'm thankful for the experiences and friends that it has brought to me.

Eyes to See said...

I watched it last night and recorded it. My husband watched some of it; we've been talking about it. I think they did a great job. I'm not sure what they used to film with, but it didn't seem to make anyone self-conscious or nervous. And the stars of the show all went right on with their stories. I think the life your Mom has right now is about as ideal as it could be under the circumstances. She gets plenty of stimulation and exercise and she doesn't seem to be the sort that is "needy". She seems to be willing to entertain herself. If she were a child; she'd be the mischevious sort; exploring and pursuing her interests and getting frustrated when thwarted. That makes her a challenge to keep up with, I'm sure, but you do get the definite sense that she's still involved and motivated to go through her days. I was glad that they showed some of her art. In each story you could see how what they had done when they were in their prime was now in evidence in a curtailed way in what they do now. Woody especially. What a cheerful fellow through and through! I'd be much more like your Mom; a bit grumpy but still able to be amused. Your Mom still seems quite quick in her own way. Thanks for letting us know to watch for the show. It was very worth watching!

Anonymous said...

My mom was diagnosed 4 years ago, rather than just watch your story I 'felt' it so completely. Unless someone has been through this they will never understand how it feels to look at your mom and not see her there - yet still see the echos of the incredible women they once were. It is a burden, and also a joy and honor and a thousand other things all at once.

You are not alone....hugs~Sheila

Bowen said...

I watched your documentary last night. Thank you for being brave enough to share your and your mother's story.

Sarah said...

You are an incredible person and reading your blog this past year has been inspirational. It helps me while I take care of my Mother-in-law. She doesn't have Alzheimers but has some dementia. Didn't get to see the documentary (we don't have a TV) but I'm sure it will come out on DVD before too long. Thanks for what you are doing - you help many more people than you know.

Anonymous said...

Annie, I have to tell you... I cried the most when your Mom did her little gesture with the thumb to the nose. My Mom does the EXACT same thing! OH HOW I LOVE THESE WOMEN. I don't know who is more precious, your Mom, for just being your Mom. Or YOU, for the thoughtful caregiving you provide.
Thank you again for sharing your life with us.
BIG (((hugs))) to you and your Mom.

~Amanda (gr8aunt)

Ann Martin said...

Thank you for allowing the cameras into your world. I watched the show last night and it is still very much in my thoughts today. I found your blog via a review of the show and I'm so glad I did; it's now in my faves list and I'll be able to follow along with you and your mom on this tough journey. I hope it will help you to know there are lots of us thinking of you, your mom, and all the other families featured in the documentary. My mom has Alzheimer's too, as did her mother and grandmother. Looking forward to the next episodes that I'm hopeful will give us reasons to be optimistic.

C Ben G said...

Ann,

I haven't had a chance to watch the videos yet as we don't have cable, but I found out you view them on line: http://www.hbo.com/alzheimers/the-films.html. I'm looking forward to seeing the films, based on the comments of others on your blog and knowing what a wonderful person you are. And I have some experience from living with my 90+ year-old grandmother for two years after she experienced memory loss from strokes to know how amazing it is the way you have helped your mother.

J said...

Annie it was wonderful to see the way you and your mom deal with this heartache that so many of us are going thru.
I loved the sounds your mom made when she gets a bit uncomfortable. The little cluckings reminded of a momma hen gathering her babies. And the thumb to the nose!!!! O My I thought my husband was going to fall out of his chair he laughed so hard. It was so bittersweet funny with a glimpse of her personality on one hand and so heart tugging on the other hand because You know it's only a small part of who this delightful woman used to be.
Mom's lost a lot of ground but there are still glimpses of her inside there.
(((HUGS))) to you! You represnted all of us who care for our loved ones... and you shinned!!!
J (AKA WilloSwitch)

Lona said...

No need to freak out at all. I am back from my 400 mile journey to watch the documentary. It coincided with a class trip I chaperoned, which allowed HBO-less me to watch! Just wanted you to know that it was wonderfully poignant and helped the rest of us to realize what a great drain it is for those who give care. Thank you for allowing us a glimpse. Prayed for you just now.